清醒

他們都問我在找個怎樣的人。我總是很誠實地回答說不知道。我知道人無完人，但亦清楚眼前的水月鏡花，儘管各有特色，並沒有一朵讓我心跳手震。就優雅快樂地享受約會吧。

我也不相信自己可以如此清醒。或許他們都錯了，問題不是我在找個怎樣的人，而是我要不要找個人。

我不要。起碼目前不要。

朋友問是不是因為前度。這個也不好說，但我非常肯定我和他都已死心。也許我是對戀愛這回事死了心。

說起前度，我剛決定要面對他了。我不想再左閃右避。我要跟他做回朋友。我相信我行的。祝福我。

30

Ok I'm officially 30 starting from today. But somehow I still think I'm a kid. A spoiled kid who just wants to have fun, to be peaceful, joyful, healthy and pretty. And be true to herself. 

God bless.

Encounter

Yesterday when I was on the way to my first date with someone, I saw a familiar face. A face I've been dreaming of for months.

My heart sank and I shivered. Like an instinct, I lowered my head and continued walking, pretending I did not see him at all. I'm not sure if he saw me. I hope not.

I thought we might be friends after some time. But now I just wish I will never meet him again. Not that I hate him. Not that I don't miss him. Not that I may lose control seeing him. I simply want to get over the whole thing ASAP. 

Actually I behaved much better than I expected. Much more calm and composed. Thanks to the Taiwan trip and this new date. 

Anyway I decide to put on glasses on my perfect-visioned eyes today. They protect me from being recognized. By him.

At least I hope so. 

Again, it s fun but tiring. 

小心翼翼

不知是否禪修改變了我的磁場，最近桃花運好像有點回來了。我小心翼翼地提醒自己，無論如何，不要迷失自己。

Let's just have fun.

七天退修營有感

~ 原來七天沒電腦電話電視是 OK 的。七天以後才回覆電話電郵是 OK 的。慢下來是 OK 的。

~ 只要專注，自會聆聽到身心真正的需要。比如說，慢下來，專心好好咀嚼和享受口中的食物，便會知道其實身體需要的食物不多。而且，少嚼幾口，能省下多少分鐘？都說慢一點是 OK 的。

~ 在靈靜的環境中，最深層的情感都變澄明清澈。夢到了他和過去種種。不停地哭。就像最初那幾天一樣。

~ 交了很多台灣朋友和幾個香港朋友。

~ 七天，掉了近 4 公斤，瘦了一小圈。視力變好。

~ 本來最愛的咖啡和朱古力，下山後都不再一樣了。我竟然吃不完那一丁點的朱古力蛋糕和一小杯的咖啡。

Yoga fasting

I'm back from the 7-day yoga fasting trip. All I can say is that I highly recommend all  of you to try it. Not just for weight loss, but for improving your mental and physical health. Do check out this website: http://www.fasting.tw/